Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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