Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
