ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
