She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
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