Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ketchup is God's man juice
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize