very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
he's gonorrhea incarnate
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
