Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
