butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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