I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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