matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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