is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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