recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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