How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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