after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize