You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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