She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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