I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
smell my finger.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
