So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
