Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
no you cant smoke seaweed
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Randomize
