p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Swine flu is the new snow day.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
