sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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