I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
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I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
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Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.