have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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