Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
she pinky promised me she was 18
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
