You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
