I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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