I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
