yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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