I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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