Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
