she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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