I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
