theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's paint friendship bongs
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
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