69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize