we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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