would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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