You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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