Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize