We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
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I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
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We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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