What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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