I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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