I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
pray to the hookup gods
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize
