I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
