Define "chronic" masturbator.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
