What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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