You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
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Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
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