You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Panties = found
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