Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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