this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Randomize
