i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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